Funny quotes about death

Funny death ecard with a quote

Jokes about dying

Life is pleasant and death is peaceful. Only the transition is frustrating.

Tell them I said something wise before dying...

I wanna die quietly sleeping, like my grandpa. Not screaming like other passengers in his car!

All of us wants to go to heaven. But... nobody wants to die!

My death will probably be caused by being sarcastic at the wrong time!

You can't get out of life alive.

There are worse things than death. Have you ever spent an hour with an insurance salesman?

Life is like a toilet paper: long and useful but always ends at the wrong time!


Funny quotes about death

I intend to live forever. Or to die trying!

Advertisement: Used tombstone. Perfect for someone named Phil Johnson.

Before you embark on a journey of revenge - dig 2 graves!

Life is eternal! Death is just a change of conditions.

Great doctor kills more people than a great general!

Men talk of killing time, while time quietly kills them. - Dion Boucicault, Irish playwright

Old people always told me at weddings: "You'll be next". But they stopped when I started to say the same words... at funerals!

Death is a very effective way to cut down expenses. - Woody Allen

More quotes