Funny quotes about alcohol

Funny ecard with alcohol quote

Alcohol jokes

Alcohol means that some of the best times you'll never remember.

Alcohol is a perfect solvent: it dissolves marriages, families, careers and friendship...

I take life with a grain of salt..., and a slice of lemon..., and a shot of tequila!

Money can't buy happiness but it can buy alcohol.

I'm not an alcoholic... I just like to go to the meetings and meet new drinking buddies!

Alcohol may be man's worst enemy, but the Bible teaches: "love your enemies".

My friends are like therapists I can drink with!

Cheerful alcohol thoughts

I cook with wine, sometimes I even add it to the food.

My grandmother is over 80 and still doesn't need glasses. She drinks right out of the bottle!

I have strong self control. Before breakfast I never drink anything stronger than gin.

24 hours in a day and 24 beers in a case. Coincidence? I don't think so.

An alcoholic is someone you don't like because he drinks as much as you do.

It was a woman who drove me to drink. I had never thanked her... - W.C. Fields

There are people you want to drink with and people who make you want to drink...

I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day.

Cool alcohol sayings

Life has many choices: whisky... vodka... rum.. gin.. wine... beer...

I drink only on two occasions - when I'm thirsty and when I'm not.

Candy is dandy, but liquor is quicker. - Ogden Nash

Alcohol is the anesthesia. It helps us to endure the operation of life.

Here is a toast to alcohol! To the cause of and solution to all of life's problems.

Alcohol ain't the answer but it helps you to forget the question !

-What you get when mixing Vodka with Holy Water?
-The Holy Spirit!

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